Thursday, November 13, 2008

Gabekob and Joshsau

Sit back while I tell you a story of a man, his friend, and a precious robe.

Several weeks back Gabekob went to his unbearably long Physics 106 class. He had this class with his bro Joshsau. On this particular day, Joshsau showed Gabekob a precious robe he had just obtained earlier that day. You see, Joshsau worked washing the locker room laundry at Brigham Young University. Every once in a while, an Israelite would mistakenly return his normal robe rather than the BYU-issue robe he checked out. This was more likely to happen when his robe was the same shade of gray. One very unfortunate Israelite accidentally returned a priceless robe, and now it was in Joshsau's possession. As a fan of odd robes, whether they be from robe.woot.com or the thrift store, Gabekob coveted this robe. He begged, pleaded, and even offered money for the robe, but Joshsau would not yield.

A couple weeks later during Physics, Gabekob ventured upstairs to the vending machine during the break that the Physics 106 prisoners were afforded to break up the monotony of a 2.5 hour physics class. Ice-Cream Twix grabbed his eyes. Putting his money in, Gabekob pressed the required combination only to see his manna lodge against the very unheaven-like glass. Despite knowing the restrictions against gathering more than one break's worth of manna, Gabekob would not let those Philistines at the vending service rob him this time. He went double or nothing and prevailed.

However, he did not need two snacks. Upon returning to the physics prison, he spotted his bro Joshsau looking famished. He saw the deep hunger in Joshsau's eyes, and in an opportunistic moment of pure genius, offered him a trade.

"Joshsau, I wilt give thou this, my second Twix, if thou wilt give me thy precious robe!" said he.

Joshsau paused and replied, "I doth hunger greatly..." Gabekob could see as Joshsau weighed the options before him as Gabekob rolled the chewy caramel, crunchy cookie, and ice-cream mixture in his mouth. "Alright, thou doeth prevail..." said Joshsau.

And so it was that Gabekob came in possession of a most coveted robe. A couple weeks later, long after the hunger pains had gone with that Twix, only to return hours later, Joshsau delivered the robe as decided. The gift was given with heavy heart, for Joshsau knew he had squandered that which had been bequeathed unto his stewardship. And now, it is I, Gabekob, who possess this shirt:
"I Gave My Word to Stop at Third. 1987 Teen Abstinence Day - Suffolk County Public Schools"


Let this clever rhyme always remind Gabekob and his fellow Israelites of the blessings of abstinence.

2 comments:

Keith said...

You must be REALLY tired of homework right now.

.:Rhea:. said...

I sat here reading this whole thing, wondering where on earth you're going with this story. I laughed so hard when I saw the shirt.